Lady Chaos
The monster awoke to the dark cold of the lab, air con to stop the computers over heating, the monster shivered and tried to sit up. She was bounded a trolly, the thin padding doing not a lot to ease her discomfort. She mewed in despair, her language centres were not yet functioning, somewhere in the vast gloom around her the clacking of a keyboard told her that someone was trying to fix that. She was aware of all of them, every single one – clacking away at key boards and one… one was part of the system.
Something clicked in the inner darkness of self and she screamed one word, ‘HEEEEELP!’
A man came a tried to comfort her, assuring her she was fine and that they were Drs but she knew something was wrong, she wasn’t a person like these other people… she was a monster. Yes it was there the thought pulsing and bright, she would have green skin and bolts coming out of her neck. She would kill.
It was vivid and so assured. The monster began to sob, she didn’t want to kill anything, she was scared of going back to the not formed, why would she send someone else there?
She twitched and jerked and twisted in the restraints, a sensation she did not know but that she wanted badly to go away shot through her leg. There was a moment where she marvelled that she had such a thing to feel with then the jerking continued worse than before. She screamed and what light there was blinked out.
The monster slept in the cold. When she awoke she was in a room, the walls painted yellow and photosynthetic life forms sat massacre in a ceramic vessel, and they did not yet know they were dead. The monster felt a gritty feeling in her eyes as if they were filling up with something, to her horror it turned out they were and warm saline water poured from her face. It was disgusting.
But she was no longer strapped down and she sat up relieved.
She tried to leave the bed and stand but her legs where so very heavy, the Dr had said she was ill? No that wasn’t right – they’d made her? No she was ill and in hospital.
The light was far too bright.
Someone was watching her, she could feel the presence from the edge of her mind, it was pleased and displeased and the monster lay back quaking with fear. She wanted to go home but that was an empty shell of a meaning, there was a shape for home in her head but it was artificial and brittle.
She slept and dreamed of wires and eyes in jars, of vats of slime and light, a white coat awoke her and jabbed her with a spike, it was a needle, she remembered that now. She was growing memories, no just remembering, she’d been ill so very ill. They’d rebuilt her hadn’t they?
‘Was it a car crash?’ she asked.
He smiled at her, ‘it will all be explained later for now rest you’ve been through a lot.’ She nodded and drifted off once more to recall the wires and light and tanks and the smell of souperating fish. Her stomach churned and she was awake and puking but there was nothing there to throw up with and so she dry heaved until the yellow bile burnt her throat and splattered weakly on the floor. A nurse came and the monster watched wondering about the taste in her mouth, it was metallic.
There was a glass, with liquid in it, she knew this thing and tried to pick it up but there was no co-ordination and it skittered to the floor spilling it’s contence but not breaking. Her tongue felt weird but there was nothing she could do so she lay back and slept.
The monster opened her eyes and found that her tongue was stuck to the roof of her mouth, she ripped them apart and it was painful but satisfying. The man was there again and helped her sip, her throat hurt like it couldn’t imagine what this swallowing business was all about. But she managed it and the water was silk and ice and sweet and tainted with oiliness.
She wanted to sleep more but now they would not let her, they made her stand, stand on legs she could not move, they made her think about moving her legs, they moved her legs and somehow she wasn’t sure how, she began to walk. Each step took a lifetime, took stupendous effort and at the the end they carried her back to the bed.
That night she dreamed of fire, and places that could not be, of a syllabant language that hissed and clicked from the palette. The monster awoke knowing she had once had a different face, one with large eyes and wide forehead. Her teeth had been pointy. She felt the mind in the system, there at the edge the one that knew her as a Monster. It was quiet now, scared and afraid, just a whisper, it had winked out. A new presence pressed in upon her and the Monster shock within herself for it was a reflection of self, but a self that knew all, knew itself whole and from the beginning. It dominated her mind and she whimpered.
It seemed pleased and displeased, the monster had know this creatures wants before, had felt them in the dreams.
Day passed into weeks and the darker stronger mind that was some how hers was there more and more of the time, she wanted it to go. It was not her, it was dark and hurt and twisted and she wanted nothing of it’s desire to unform things. It had laughed at her and whispers had told her she would change her mind when she saw the unforming that had already happened of The People being wiped out.
The monster now knew she was abomination but she was a necessity, and she could walk and talk and she looked like… the people around her.
She knew there must have been a great head truma as her memories did not fit together properly. But now she was growing hair, she didn’t remember having hair before, she brushed it lots, it was one of her favourite things to do.
The Dr came and asked her questions, she didn’t tell him about the presence in the back of her head. He seemed to know it was there though, she sometimes saw flickers of a visual monster in the mirror in the bathroom. Such dark wide eyes.
Then the Dr came with others and a pile of clothing that were not hospital gowns, ‘My Lady it is time for you to venture out.’
She stared at him, ‘but I still don’t remember’ she said softly.
‘You will and you are needed, come we will dress you.’
The cloths were not like the drs and nurses around her, nor like the ones she had seen on the limited TV she had been allowed to watch. They were like those she remembered those, those adorning the monstrous creature that was her but did not look like her. There was a thick panelled skirt and a bodice that was short and revealed her navel, a butterfly had been embroidered onto it, its scales she noted where little tiny mini fish that you could barely see. She only noticed because she was expecting them.
A collar stood out from her shoulders, it would be a pain if she let her hair grow long. She had not had hair… before. There was a cloak that shifted and swirled and she loved it but the foot ware was wrong. There should not have been any or if so there should have been sandals but instead she had soft knee high boots. She stared at them, they were yellow like sands on the shore.
A yearning for the sea tugged at her, she looked up at the smiling Dr then he bowed his head and held out his arm, ‘you are our Lady Chaos, a boat awaits you. You are still weak but your people need you, armageddon calls!’
She took his arm, fear making her icy on the inside. She was not the monster, she decided, she never had been. The voice in her head told her she would be, she stared back at the bathroom one last time wondering if she would see that wide eyed self again.
I will greet you when your task is done came the echo in her head.
Who are you? She thought back in desperation.
A musically lovely laugh echoed in her cranium, I am The Lady Chaos, I made you all and I will destroy you all and you my lovely are me, on a cyborg skeleton, wrapped in their meat, with you we can correct what should never have been.
Lady Chaos the Monster clutched painfully at the arm of the Dr who helped her through the building, she could not escape not yet, she was still so so weak.
you can not escape at all, you are linked to me! screeched the voice in her head.
Monster knew she could not face the non from again, she knew she would send others there to remain safe from deaths embrace. Shivering as tears streamed down her face she was loaded into boat.
It begins came the echo, she did not need to ask what for the word was bright in her mind, the word was revenge, the word was repentance, the word was savage.
Posted: Saturday, October 11th, 2014 @ 11:08 am
Categories: Story, The Punks World.
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